Monday, August 28, 2006

The word with different meanings..

Once there's this girl who never believe in love the way most commoner do. For her love is just a short form of universal pile up caring words. It's easier to say 'I love You' 3 words than repeating the whole long conventional 'I care for you and miss you and like being with you having a good time with you bla bla bla..'Till one day she found someone whom she really has this special kind of feeling and somehow they had a great time together for sometime. Months later, they're separated.

One day she saw him, she saw him holding another girl's hand and they even kissed. Her heart shattered, feeling like she'd lost something.. something very oblivious that she never notice the existance of it before..

Sometimes when we say 'I love you', we are expecting too much from it. The 3 words might mean 'I care for you and I like being with you bla bla bla and also I owned ur lips n u're not allowed to kiss other lips.. etc etc Aint love suppose to be something generous? Why does all the jealousy and the thought of owning someone get into the way? Imagine you having a girlfriend that you 'love' and she is *kissing around with many other guys, and you're supposed to be happy for her coz "Ah .. everybody loves 'Raymond'..(kindly replace Raymond with your gf's name.. guess everyone should know bout that sitcom)"
*Research shown that more germs are transfered tru a handshake compare to french kissing =p

Or maybe that's what we called the ideal 'OPEN RELATIONSHIP'

Next time when you use the 3 magical words, u might get yourself under her pants and at the same time she might be doing it with many other guys as well.. I don't mean to make woman sounds like a slut, most guys are bastard too.. far worst than woman!

For me, 'I Love You' is as simple as I want you to be happy and I will not do anything that you're not happy with.. As simple as that .. and will always be~

P/S:I'm using 'she' in above story coz guys are far more promiscuous :D

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Over sensitive!?

The sensitivity of a binary classification test or algorithm, such as a blood test to determine if a person has a certain disease, or an automated system to detect faulty products in a factory, is a parameter that expresses something about the test's performance. The sensitivity of such a test is the proportion of those cases having a positive test result of all positive cases (e.g., people with the disease, faulty products) tested.

Just today a friend of mine telling me that I'm being over sensitive, emotionally type that involves disagreement in conversation. All these while I do admit that I'm sensitive towards the changes of person and surroundings and I find that a good thing coz it might help me to adapt easily with changes. Being OVER sensitive will affect wrong judgement and lead to confusion and alo disagreement.

As an egoist, I will always stick to my firm point of view. I assume myself not such type of sensitive weaklings that will get hurt easily or those that could write a poem out of nowhere; heck I never write any poems before in my whole life. Yet when my friend said,"Nah, I'm not as sensitive as you~" it felt like the egoistic belief of mine scattered to pieces. It's just a very simple line where the message is about my friend feeling OK but somehow the word used in it gets into me. And YES because I'm over sensitive I felt it.. sensitive me =.=

Being sensitive is when I hold on the matter tightly, think too much from a simple issue or maybe over obsession with something until it affects the rational decision and mind. Months ago I've told myself not to hold into things too tight and yet I still never learn from my mistake, still couldnt let go on simple things. Thus, I'll try to sort it out, take a step back from everything and walk forward the proper way it should be, a better approach in every related field.

It's a 4 leaves clover and it's said to bring good luck. For me, luck is something that we gain from preserverance. I never really had good luck in life, most of them come in disguise I guess, since I don't really feel it.. or maybe I'm just not sensitive enough on it =p. I found this picture while browsing my com.. hope it'll bring me good luck!

And I shall preserve myself.. and shall not be over sensitive, unless I could write good poems out of it to make enough money for my living..

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Life so far

This blog ain't getting public anyway so I'll just write about stuff that I might read in years to come. Week 9 of MMU, currently having a very busy routine. I'll be having 3 exams in this week and labs as well as assignments to be done.

An hour of examination will cost me almost whole day. In the same day before the paper I'll be revising like mad thanks to the slacking and drama watching marathon days or weeks before. After having a great time 'copying' during exams, most of the time we'll go for dinner/supper and reach home after 12 midnight. Imagine having 3 days of examinations in this week, gosh..

Another thing that bothers me is the renovation of the new house. Discussion will always lead to arguement with my dad. He always have funny and unpractical ideas, my brother and I will have no choice but to voice out and risk being scolded by him just to prevent mistakes that might cost thousands. Well, it's not that we move house frequently so guess it'll be fine after we moved in. Crossed fingers and hoping for the best, my stepmom might be moving in as well. I haven't been seeing her for quite sometime.

Health condition currently is fine, having a better diet( eating an apple + a cup of milk for dinner ) sometimes, nasi lemak still a part of my life. Having sleeping disorder due to heaty body to the extend of getting red eyes.. I need herbal tea!

Oh and bout relationship, things are still the same. It's a non-existing long distance relationship with a cute young sister that I'm afraid of...

Friday, August 18, 2006

Monday, August 07, 2006

What Should I Blog ?

Blogging is something very different compare to scratching your emotions and thoughts in your diary or journal. Blogging is more public, where from everything you write people will judge you and your personality, thus you might twist and turn on some facts or using less strong words to be more defensive and constructive. Thus, I shall restrict myself in writing bout anything related or indirectly related to my life and non-existing relationship to avoid any future speculations by someone (You know I mean you if you read this =p)

Still, my life long wish is to be good in writing so that I could get enough visitors to my blog and gain some profit from google Adsense. For over a year I've managed to collect around 5 USD but the paycheck will only be issued when it reaches 100 USD =.=. Perhaps I should think of some cool ideas to boost the visitors to my page.

Maybe I should start a hate-blog .... bitching around with stuffs I hate. Maddox is very succesful with his hate-blog. And here goes ..
Ok, guess I should stop to avoid losing possible dates who visit my blog..

Maybe I should write jokes ...
*In chinese accent* YOUR MAMA SO FAT .. THAT SHE ..
That's lame too..

Maybe I should just upload my friend's video into this blog and gain profit from his seminude high profile action :D Anyway, those who visit my blog please leave a comment and if the demand is high I should consider releasing the video clip!